Please stop chasing your dream

I know it was hard for you to stop working today. There’s so much work left to do.

You checked your email in the car on the way home.

You walked in the door and wanted to go open your laptop.

There are emails that you want to answer. OK, maybe you don’t want to answer them but you feel like you should answer them. You’re thinking about them while you’re with us.

daddy home

After five minutes of being home you pull out your phone and your thumbs start flying around the screen. You feel a mild sensation of accomplishment as your inbox goes from 24 to 23. I’m waiting for you to finish. You open another email and I call your name again.

“Dad. Dad. Dad.”

You reply, “Yeah, I’m almost done.”

You’re never done. It’s in your pocket. It’s always there.

I won’t always be here. I won’t always want to play with you.

I’m glad you work so hard for us but right now I want to be with you.

Can they wait? I’ve been waiting all day.

Please stop chasing that dream. I’m not a dream. I’m real and I need you. I need all of you for a few days. For a few days I’m your job.

Stop chasing that dream dad. Please? It’ll be there Monday.

  • http://www.changeyouremotions.com Linda Lochridge Hoenigsberg

    The cat’s in the cradle, huh Andy? Great post and super cute picture! BTW…I did also back the Crowd Funding for Authors campaign and cannot wait to go through all the material!

    • http://www.takepermission.com/ Andy Traub

      Me too. I should do that on the way to WDS this year.

  • http://kcprocter.com KC

    BOOM! Nailed it. #DadLifeRules

    Thank you for the reminder, Andy.

    • http://dDrJkAndiko Joujou

      your physician gave you the brush off on getintg your child tested. If he is 3, there should be some strong baselines you can look at can you have decent back and forth conversations with him on subjects that are not high interest? Does he relate to you emotionally (positive and negative) or just knowledge based interactions? Does he use his own sentences all the time or does he script? (Like using phrases from a cartoon in the right context in other everyday situations ) Does he have OCD like tendencies or strong preferences to colors, toys, etc? Does he interact with other children appropriately? Or is he the little boy playing in the sand by himself when the other little boys are doing parallel play with their cars? These are by no means a comprehensive list of questions at all and if you’ve met one person on the spectrum, you’ve met one person on the spectrum. However, if you find the answer to many of these questions is yes, then I would push forward and get him evaluated. My concerns for my kiddo were blown off, too. Also, a lot of folks with food allergies have issues with motor skills and balance etc. Although, not all kiddos with allergies have these issues. If your child is the one who is falling a lot or is low on energy and does not seem athletic, you might consider getintg him evaluated by an OT for his motor skills and balance.

  • http://bradkindercoaching.com/kinder-coaching-blog Brad

    So true, Andy. The world needs more fathers that can say “it can wait until Monday”

  • http://burnoutsucks.com Jim Hough

    Time passes so quickly my friend. I can’t remember when my four kids came running to greet me at the door for the last time at the end of the workday. But, there was a last time. Now they are all in their twenties pursuing their own lives. I do not regret one second of pushing work away and getting down on the floor to play. Not. One. Second. Blessings!

  • http://shultzphotoschool.com Kyle

    Needed to hear this. Thk you Andy.

  • http://www.aterriblehusband.com Nick

    Clearly you’ve been in my house. And head.

  • Laura Mc Coy

    Beautiful.
    Just Beautiful!

  • http://xneYnbmyy Cleinedi

    Many believers in psceuosciende like UFO’s or creationism often use the argument from ignorance. This logical fallacy is structured as, we don’t have an explanation for this phenomenon, therefore it was a UFO or therefore, god did it. Put another way, it’s saying, I’m ignorant of the cause, therefore I’m going to believe it was the really cool-sounding mystical explanation. One of the problems with the argument from ignorance is that when a valid, supportable explanation _does_ come along, those holding the fantastical beliefs will not admit they were wrong, and go on continuing to believe in their wishful thinking.As the late great Carl Sagan so succinctly put it, claims require proof, and extraordinary claims require extraordinary proof. Don’t be so quick to assume the most fantastical explanation out there. The truth that it may have been just military flares may be a lot less exciting, but it’s a dangerous thing when explanations are determined by a popularity contest rather than by reason, logic, and hard evidence.

  • http://www.mattham.com/ Matt Ham

    Thanks Andy Traub. This is a message that needs to be shared.

  • Stuart Crane

    Good stuff. Nothing is more important than family and health.

    • http://www.TakePermission.com Andy Traub

      Thanks brother. Coming from you I know the truth in your words.

  • http://www.fatherofone.com/ Michael Wright

    I give my 9 yr old permission to tell Dad to “cut off the computer” at 4 or 5pm each day, given the day’s schedule. That is when the workday ends. Like you said, they ain’t young forever, but building the relationship NOW will help secure the position that Dad will always be available.

  • http://kcprocter.com/ KC Procter

    Right between the eyes. Thank you, Andy. Great to catch up briefly on Sunday. Looking forward to my next trip to Nashville.

  • La McCoy

    Precious

  • http://www.adammartin.us/ Adam Martin

    @andytraub:disqus Such a great message. This really hits home. Thank you for sharing this!